Just Say NO To Pink Slime!


As discussed a good few times, we’re advocates of homemade whenever possible. Nowhere is that good fight more needed than with The Burger.

If you’ve ever had amazing, memorable, Holy Crud burgers, I’ll guarantee you a couple things:
1. They ground their own meat, and
2. They either made their own buns or got ’em from a very local bakery.

having those bases covered, your frankly hard pressed not to make a great burger. So without further ado…

For the burgers, we’ll go 50%-50% pork and lean beef; pork for the extra.. well, fat, and beef for the main flavor notes. You can do anything you like with this mix, and your basics need not be fancy. I but the 2 or 3 for 1 stuff at Albertsons a lot an they make a perfectly decent base for a great burger.

Season as you please. I put in fresh oregano, garlic, smoked salt, smoked paprika and good black pepper

I used the bigger grinder plate for the KitchenAid, which does a fine job.

Now for the buns: I’ve worked hard to pare this down to a reasonable volume; most of what I’ve seen out there makes 12 to 16 buns per batch, which is kinda a lot. We wanted to be able to do maybe 6, so that they’ll get eaten up in a day or two, with no waste. Here’s what we came up with

Burger or Dog Buns
1/2 Cup Milk
1/4 Cup Water
2 Tablespoons Butter
2 – 2 1/2 Cups All Purpose Flour
1 heaping teaspoon active dry Yeast
1 Tablespoon granulated Sugar
3/4 teaspoon Salt
1 Egg

Heat the milk, water and butter to roughly 100 F. Fill your primary mixing bowl with water as warm as you can get outta your faucet and let it sit until warmed through.

Mix 1 cup of flour, the yeast, sugar and salt together thoroughly.

Put the wet mix into the drained mixer bowl; add the dry mix and mix by hand. Crack the egg and reserve a teaspoon of egg white. Mix the rest of the egg into the blend.

Add remaining flour 1/4 cup at a time, mixing until the dough pulls away from the mixer bowl, leaving it more or less clean.

Continue to knead for about 5 minutes until the dough is smooth and elastic.

NOTE: You can do this entirely in your mixer if you prefer; just use the dough hook and mix/knead on low speed.

For hamburgers, form 6 equal balls, place on a greased baking sheet and flatten into roughly 3″ discs.
For hot dog buns, form six rectangles about 3″ x 5″, then roll them up tightly along the long axis and fold the ends in on themselves. Place on a greased baking sheet, seams down.

Allow to rise for about half an hour. Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Mix egg white with a 1/4 teaspoon of cold water. Brush buns with egg white mixture and bake for 10 minutes, or until golden brown. Remove and allow to cool before cutting.

We did ours inside in a pan, so as not to waste any of those incredible flavors – Any questions?

The Eternal Search for Perfect ‘Za


Home made pizza that is…

If y’all hang here at all, you know that we believe home made to be best. That said, and just being honest here, if we were the best at everything, we’d never go out to eat. We do, of course, therefore, it stand to reason that there are folks out there better at some things than us. At least for the time being…

We love pizza, and we love to make it, because ours is really good, buuuuut; it wasn’t so good that we couldn’t find better out there.

Notice the past tense, wasn’t…

We’ve been working on our pizza for a long time, and I am happy to say that, truly, I think we’re there now. What we’re about to share is as good as almost anything you can find out there and way better than most, so here’s the scoop!

CAVEAT 1:
We’re making here what to us is as close to the genuine Pizza Napolitana as we can do. We are talking about, then, a pizza with a very thin crust across most of the pie, with a relatively thick and tall edge. For variations, there really are only two; either Pizza Marinara, (Tomato, garlic, basil, and extra virgin olive oil), or, as we’ll do here, Pizza Margherita, with tomato, mozzarella, Basil and extra virgin olive oil. That said, of course you can and should make pizza with lots more than this on it, but when you’re going for the best, you really do want to keep it simple and true to the deep roots.

CAVEAT 2: If you’re going to make really good pizza, then everything you use must be top notch. No, you don’t do this every time you make pizza, but when you’re out to make really, really good pizza, then it’s gotta be top shelf all around. That means from water to cheese and everything in between, no cheap stuff. And yes, it really makes a difference…

Dough:
2 1/2 to 3 1/2 cups Antimo Caputo 00 Flour
1 cup GOOD water, (Spring water or, at the very least, filtered)
2 Tablespoons Extra Virgin Olive Oil
1/2 teaspoon Salt
1 package active dry Yeast

Heat your water to about 100º F.

Dissolve yeast thoroughly in water, then add olive oil, salt and 2 cups of flour. You can either do this dough by hand or mixer, (As long as it’s done on low speed).

Thoroughly mix everything, and keep adding flour until the dough is still moist, but not sticking to your hands when lightly floured, (Or to the sides of the mixing bowl).

Knead by hand or mixer for about 6 minutes, until dough is elastic and smooth.

Place the dough in a lightly oiled, non-reactive bowl, cover with a clean, dry cloth, and place the whole thing into your fridge overnight.

“What?” you cry, incredulous, “Over night in the fridge??!

Yeah. Really. See, this is, in fact, one of the secrets of really good pizza dough and really good pizza.

First and foremost, yes, dough will indeed rise at refrigeration temperatures. it rises slowly, which lets you get away with overnight, but it will most definitely rise. It’s called a Cold Rise, and here’s why you wanna do it.

Mixing and initial kneading gets everything together and the process begun. The rest and first rise is when fermentation starts. The second rise, or proof, loosens up gluten. Baking finishes the magic, with a bunch of chemical reactions that makes that final, incredible pizza.

When dough is fermented/risen in warm conditions, it happens quite quickly; this is why you can make pizza dough in under an hour, start to finish. Doing so, however, has definite shortcomings. Rather than making great tasting and performing dough, what you get are some off flavors you don’t want, (Sour, for one), and a lack of complexity that, all by itself, can be the difference between OK and great.

A cold rise slows down the reactions, allowing more desirable and complex flavors to develop, and you end up with a much better texture to boot; and that, of course, is exactly what great pizza is about.

When you pull your dough and are ready to bake, either toss it or stretch it by hand but do not, ever. roll it out – You kill all that hard work when you do. 90% of your pie should be almost thin enough to see through; the edges should be left pretty much inflated from the rise and about 1″ high.

Sauce:
Plain and simple, you gotta make your own, period, end of story. Now, next thing; for sauce, good canned tomatoes are better than fresh, 9 times out of ten. Really. See, most of the year in most places, tomatoes just are not that spectacular. If you’ve ever grown your own maters, (And you’d better if you can, dang it), you know that any of those are far superior to anything you can find in the store. Unless you’re growing, or hooked up to Community Supported Agriculture, or a great farmers market, (And again, if you can do one of those, you sure better be!), buy good canned tomatoes for your sauce. And I mean the premium brands at your store, not the stuff in a white can with big black letters. If you can find genuine San Marzano tomatoes, definitely try them, but believe it or not, I like Trader Joe’s better.

Here’s what we do for a basic 16″ pizza.

1 12 oz. can crushed or ground Tomatoes, (try Trader Joe’s, they’re surprisingly good)
6 – 8 leaves Fresh Oregano, chiffenade(1 teaspoon if dried)
2 – 4 cloves fresh garlic, minced
1 teaspoon extra virgin olive oil
1/2 teaspoon balsamic vinegar
1/4 teaspoon salt
A few twists of fresh ground pepper

That’s it. Put everything in a bowl and motor boat it until it’s nice and smooth; you can use a blender if you don’t have a boat motor, (AKA, immersion blender). Put in a non-reactive bowl and allow to blend for at least 1 hour, and overnight is much better. If you feel things are too liquid, put your sauce over medium low heat and gently allow it to reduce. Low and slow for that, as in barely a simmer. Don’t get things too dry; keep in mind, you’re going to cook very hot long enough for that to have some affect on your sauce.

Toppings:
Make your own mozzarella, and if you’ve never done that, then definitely make your own! It’s easier than you think and oh so much better! If you can”t do that, get premium fresh mozzarella, as local as you can.

Fresh, from your garden, or a friends garden, or a neighbors garden or a farmers market or CSA; anything else just don’t cut it…

Same as above. We used some gorgeous locally grown heirloom ‘maters for this pie and they were Put it all together.

Baking:
For great pizza, you need a stone of some kind. You just do, unless you have your own pizza oven like my friend Mr. Z.
Crank your oven up as high as it will go. Seriously, pedal to the metal, all you’ve got Scotty.
Put your stone in the oven and leave it there for 45 minutes, until there’s no doubt in the world that sucker is hot.

Assemble everything lickity split and get it in the oven. 5 minutes at full bore will do the deed.

Now, enjoy. Have seconds. Smile at each other.

Yeah, it’s that good…

Oysters, Love ‘em or Hate ‘em?


‘Cause there ain’t no in between! You either hear folks say ‘Yum’ or ‘Etch!’; I’ve never heard a “Oh, they’re kinda OK…” from anyone, have you?

Alright, first to the basics!

If you’re gonna do oysters and you don’t live near where they come from, then get them from a place where they do, that you know if the best, freshest you can get, period! We don’t do oysters often, but when we do, we get really good ones and we do it from somebody who needs and wants the business. Take this opportunity to help out folks from the Gulf, you’ll make their day, get great food, and do good in the bargain. Here are some great options for y’all.

Zirlott’s is from coastal Alabama; family run, great food, great folks.

Tony’s Seafood in Baton Rouge is the same thing; local, fresh, great folks!

Now, a few points about delaing with ’em after you got ’em. Fresh oysters must be alive just before consumption. There’s a simple test for this: oysters must be capable of closing the shell tightly.
Open oyster? Knock on the shell; a live one’ll close up and is therefore good to go.
If they’re open and stay that way, they’re dead, so chuck ‘em, don’t shuck ‘em!
A dead oysters, or oyster shells filled with sand may stay closed, but they ‘clack’ when ya rap ‘em – That’s a no go too, (And why they’re called ‘clackers’)

Shucking oysters requires skill, ‘cause live oysters outside of water close themselves in with a powerful muscle to seal in their juices and survive.

The generally used method for opening oysters is to use a special knife (called an oyster knife, a variant of a shucking knife), with a short and thick blade about 2 inches long.

Best advice if you’re new at it? Buy ‘em shucked! If not, get a cut-proof glove for your holding hand! If you’re lucky enough to not cut yourself with the knife, you likely will on the oyster shell itself, which can be razor sharp, so be sober and extra careful throughout the process!

Slip the blade in at the hinge in the rear of the shell. Twist the blade until you hear and feel a slight pop. Now slide the blade upward to cut the adductor muscle (which holds the shell closed). Bingo, you’re there.

So, how to eat ’em?

On the Half Shell
Straight away, on a bed of ice. Slice lemons, fine dice onion or scallion, have a bottle of hot sauce on hand, and maybe some really nice fresh cracked pepper. Slide, don’t chew – If you’ve ever done that, you won’t likely do it again…

Deep Fried
Shuck and remove oysters from shell, rinse and trim thoroughly.

Build a dredge:
Mix well in a bag
1 cup all purpose flour
2 tablespoons corn starch
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper

Pop oysters into the dredge bag and shake a few times. Tap excess dredge off before placing in the fryer.
Heat your oil to 375 degrees F and keep it there; that means introducing a single oyster at a time and allowing a little pause for your fryer to recover the desired temp before you add more: Keep the batches to 4 or 5 tops. Doing so assures you of light taste and minimal sogginess.

Pair with fresh homemade fries, onion rings, or coleslaw. Have plenty fo fresh sliced lemon ready too.

Oysters Rockefeller
8 large raw oysters.
1 Cup spinach, cooked and drained.
2 Tablespoons onion, chopped.
1/2 Tablespoon parsley, chopped.
1/2 stick Celery.
2 Tablespoons soft breadcrumbs.
1 tablespoons of butter.
1 lemon, sliced
Dash of salt
Dash of hot sauce.

Open the oysters, remove from their shells and drain. Reserve the shells.

Fill an baking dish, (Or individual ones), with rock salt.

Place reserved shells in each dish and put an oyster in each shell.

Saute your spinach in a little olive oil.

Rough chop the onion and parsley, (You can put ’em together, no problem).

Crush or juice celery and reserve 1/2 teaspoon juice.

Add celery juice, salt, hot sauce and breadcrumbs and saute over medium high heat for 2 to 3 minutes.

Spoon about 1 tablespoon of spinach mixture over each oyster.

Bake in a preheated oven at 400°F for 10 minutes, (Sauce should be bubbling nicely.)

Serve with plenty of lemon slices.